Friday, August 05, 2005

excerpt 1 from mother mexico

here is the first excerpt from my novel mother mexico. enjoy. (or not) and feel free to leave a comment. if you'd like to be on a mailing list to receive notice when i post new excerpts, e-mail me at mv_49496@hotmail.com


The air was thick with sweat. Natalie licked her lips, tasting her surroundings. One glance over to Carl revealed a calm, if musky, composure. Only his pinky, white-clenched spoke of his worry. She hoped his left didn’t match. The inspectors were rummaging through the trunk, probably poking the contents of the baby’s bag with a dirty gun butt. She made a constant effort to let the outside mirror someone else – a demure and patient suburban housewife, perhaps. What would they find – clean, if worn baby essentials – she did what she could with her carefully rationed stack of quarters. The proprietor of the “Squeaky- Clean Laundromat” back in Mesa had made her part with a few more than she would have liked to. No overloading was right up there with no dyeing at Ping’s place. Now the clothes would probably need to be done again. The border inspector was back at the window, his shirt pocket straining – hopefully with just one of the money stashes they had scattered throughout their belongings and the car’s frame. In a worst case scenario she still had the money hanging heavy in her bra and the packet she had sewn in the baby’s undershirt. The guard grinned as if he imagined he had more than he had hoped for out of this nervous family and handed their doctored documents back to Carl. The trunk slammed with a thunk and they were waved on. Carl tossed the papers on to Natalie’s lap, drove on and turned on his music as a lone celebratory gesture. There would be no grin, no discussion – perhaps some drunken bragging later on. She was used to his ways. Because he had earned the fear most people had of him, the biggest pull for her was the white knuckle she spotted in him time and again. She looked back at the baby. She thought he looked like a Thomas and Carl had taken the new name down to the ID shop on the corner before they left. She was happy with her pick and was glad they had him documented now even if it was an undercover sort and it would take conscious effort to remember his new name. Now on their way they could begin anew across the border. Baby Thomas was sleepily sucking his thumb in his carseat. Natalie handed him a juice bottle. He probably needed milk, but she knew it would spoil in a heartbeat. They were trying to travel as a self-contained unit because, as Carl had pointed out, it was always at a gas station or convience shop that criminals were stopped short on their exodus.

3 comments :

  1. thanks to those who have e-mailed

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  2. Anonymous1:26 PM

    Your writing captivates you right into the story and its surroundings.Reading just this one page leaves me totally intrigued and I eagerly await to read the rest of the book.You truley are talented.

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  3. Derrick Moore8:37 PM

    You have me right in the thick of the surroundings, I feel like I'm looking over someones shoulder. Keep up the great work, I'll buy the first copy. you've got real talent!!!

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